People, we only build or destroy. It's that simple. We unfortunately categorize our experiences, dealings with others, and conclusions by the emotional effect they had on us. However, that is a moot point, at best. Let's start by asking ourselves "did I build or destroy" in situations. You see, we can fool ourselves into thinking that we can live this life that is only surface, but any intelligent mind cannot rest with that assumption. We know "for every action, there is a reaction;" we also know "you reap what you sow;" among many other idioms. I believe they all stem from a general principle: you either build or destroy.
To share an experience, I recently discussed this concept with a sister about the same age as me. She has a tendency to allow her work environment, her children, and her own insecurities to take precedence over reason (which I am guilty of as well, at times.) So I explained to her that there are only two things that we can produce (destruction and life, for this example,) and the acknowledgment of how we are performing is representative of how well we manage those two. So she asks me, "what does 'building' have to do with my bad ass kid? I want to 'destroy' bad behavior!" Good question/point. We would have to go back to the beginning to tackle that...
As parents, grandparents, uncles/aunts, etc, the proverbial rod-of-correction is one that is wielded without much regard. But as you seek to destroy bad behavior, what do you build up in it's place? I get it, you want your lil man/girl to make better grades. But is whupping them for failing an adequate response? What does that instill? Does it teach them that the world beats down someone who makes mistakes? Would that encourage them to try ANYTHING again? Probably not. So we continued the discussion on what can you do to build them up? Get a tutor? Maybe. I think it's deeper than that. I suggested providing another outlet altogether. Where one struggles in academia, they will succeed elsewhere. Let's face it, school and the routine is a skill within itself. It's a skill that not everyone is proficient in. So why not find out what someone's strength is? I summed it up by asking what else is the child interested in and why can't they do more of that?
I am not that old or too young. What I have learned so far is only because I listened to those around me kind enough to put a lil nigga up on game. For every "C" student, there is an entrepreneur, dancer, actor, broker, musician, philanthropist, etc, inside. What I urged my friend and anyone else for that matter, is to focus on "building" as a lifestyle. No one is good at everything. Even more so, a lot of people aren't good at what you THINK they should be good at. Look at me... I'm 6'6", Black, athletic build, and can't play basketball for shit. This country says I'm supposed to be good at it though. Matter of fact, people ONLY ask me if I play basketball! LOL!
I am going to continue this discussion and hopefully I am going in a direction that you dig. If not, then "build" up a wall to keep the swag out. Chuurch.
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